Unlucky number.

Hey, Uglymoon here! ...that was kinda lame, sorry.

So.. I think it's okay to say I'm an incredibly awkward person. I have a strange, slightly dark sense of humor, fashion, way of thinking, acting and all that stuff humans do. I never seem to be ..."normal". So I figured that is probably(100%sure trus cience nstuff) the reason I have no friends! (except for Mat ofc, we're equally weird)
   ~So... Uglymoon, why are you telling us this incredibly interesting stuff?~ Well! Since I'm so great at making friends, I'm gonna share my knowledge. So ladies and gentlemen, I present you:
 A tutorial on How To Make Friends Equally Twisted As You by Ugly Moon-phase herself/itself/thing/whatever..
(this is actually a true story about how me and Mat met, so lol enjoy I guess..)
  ~ First step, very important, is to lose your sanity(or pretend so if u want to idk don't rly recommend so)
  ~ Second thing is to get yourself sent to some kinda mental hospital. Another important thing is to make sure you stay in only one position (witch is a sitting fetus position obv) for at least a week.
  ~ Third thing is to get someone's attention (basically just make them feel sorry for you), throw some awful jokes and get their number or find them on Facebook. Also get to know where they live.
  ~ Now, the fourth step is getting out of the hospital and visiting them. It's important that you visit them, not the opposite, trust me.
  ~ While you are hanging out together, ask about their other friends. They probably won't have much because otherwise why would they try to find one in the mental hospital, or why would they be there in a first place? So if they actually don't have any other friends than you - congrats! you failed, and gotta do all this again. Good luck! But if the individual do have friends make them let you meet them.
  ~ Be scared a lot.
  ~ So now, you find yourself in an awkward situation, where there is just you, your captured person and the future friend, and none of you know what to do. But don't worry, I've got your back! Its not hard tbh, you just gotta ask about books they read, movies they watch, throw some 'that's what she said' jokes, have some alcohol together, then ice cream, watch crappy YouTube videos, talk about poop and other fun stuff..
  ~ After they go home, you got to get their number or stalk them on Facebook, and wait until they will show some interest in you. If it doesn't happen, just go ahead and text them.
  ~ Then text each other a lot. All day, everyday about all the stupid shit you both are into, like dictators, french art, youtube, books, more youtube, etc., etc.
  ~ *You can also complain about your life, its optional*

So here you go! You obtained a friend! yaaay
(u can also keep the captured person, from the mental institution)

~ I just want to tell you not to blame me if you lost 2 months of your life in a hospital, or you didn't get a friend or smth. Not my fault, k, I tried.

So yeah.. thanks for sacrificing your time to read all this.


~ So if I'll survive, then I'll see you tomorrow.. ~


--A friend has been given to you by: --
 ~ Ugly Moon-phase ~